Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Inside the Rainbow

Thirdling goes in for the kill :)

Makes me want to go make more, really. At the moment it's more immediately rewarding than writing. Delayed gratification isn't good for people with my attention span. Maybe I should just eat the monitor.
I suck so bad at writing lately that today I resorted to making a list of 101 things that there are roughly 101 of. Or not. Or maybe I just wish. Or things I wish there weren't. Don't read this list. Go write. You're wasting your time, I'm telling you, because I don't even know what some of these things mean.
1. 101 years of solitude (how long it would take me to write a novel)
2. 101 donuts
3. 101 kids (yours? mine? no clue why I wrote this.)
4. 101 dominoes
5. 101 oak trees in a circle. They are all 101 years old.
6. 101 gusts of wind to knock down the neighbour's annoying (i.e., sunblocking) tree. The gusts are all 101 kmh.
7. 101 bras tried on to find one that fits
8. 101 children dying of cancer today
9. 101 layers of dirt over a fossilized dinosaur egg.
10. 101 pussywillow buds on the tree outside
11. 101 rejections
12. 101 hairs to stop up the bathtub drain
13. 101 UFO sightings
14. 101 kilograms of cocaine intercepted at the border
15. 101 thorns on the rose cane in front of my office window
16. 101 orgasms (in how long? that's the question)
17. 101 cups of tea in a month
18. 101 franks to buy Prima a party dress for the school ball
19. 101 lines of poetry
20. 101 days waiting for my rejection
21. 101 raisons
22. 101 test taken my final year of college (really? who counted? who cares? I write strange things.)
23. 101 men who came and went that I would have liked to talk to but was too shy when I traveled Europe 20 years ago.
24. 101 drawings stacked in my cupboard
25. 101 rocks brought up from the river
26. 101 cookies given away at christmas
27. 101 heartbeats per minute in a newborn
28. 101 missed heartbeats when my kids scare me to death
29. 101 blank notebooks, because I am mentally ill and can't stop buying them.
30. 101 teacups, see #29
31. 101 mugs, see #29
32. 101 cm of snow would be 101 too many
33. 101 degrees F would be just right, absolutely, mindbogglingly perfect, if it were just about to rain. Good. Now, keep it like that.
34. 101 links of chain, soldered into place to make a sculpture
35. 101 steps to get to M's house
36. 101 days pregnant with my boy, give or take. give.
37. 101 years to get over it
38. "101 ways to start a fight, by some Irish gentleman whose name eludes me."
39. 101 pages of nonsense written for every publishable page.
40. 101 years old by the time I die, at least. I hope.
41. 101 times I bursh my teeth on Sundays in a year. Roughly.
42. 101 times I check Duotrope everday.
43. 101 visits to a physiotherapist is what it would take to straighten my kinked neck out, at least.
44. 101 days of snow. that's how it feels.
45. 101 ignored prayers
46. 101 socks to sort
47. 101 bills paid this year
48. 101 braids on my sister-in-law's head
49. 101 annoying writing prompts (and this isn't even one of them. perhaps I should give them a try...)
50. 101 recipes for cake
51. 101 sighs, I'm only half way through
52. 101 pounds to make a supermodel
53. 101 hours worth of gardening that needs to be done
54. 101 chocolates in a big tin
55. 101 guests at the last party I didn't want to go to. zzzzzzzzzz.......
56. 101 slugs and snails in the garden. (should I say slugcicles...)
57. 101 times a year we have pizza. feels like.
58. 101 lies I tell.
59. 101 times I'd like to hit her.
60. 101 sore places on my heart when we had to leave ireland.
61. 101 reasons to go back
62. 101 reasons why I can't
63. 101 minutes I lie awake in the night, on average.
64. 101 blogs I wish I could read every day
65. 101 cars Jay Leno has
66. 101 things in the attic I should throw away
67. 101 m&ms on Thirdling's birthday cake
68. 101 people on this earth, born at the same instant I was
69. 101 pairs of shoes in this house, for five pairs of feet. pffff...
70. 101 grams in a bar of Bärnerschoggi
71. 101 windows inside my head
72. 101 books on writing I own
73. 101 post-its, stuck to my desk
74. 101 desires
75. 101 more seconds until I need to pee
76. 101 homework assignments the kids do in a month
77. 101 times I kiss manwithbeard on the cheek in a month
78. 101 seconds to think up each entry. this is getting harder
79. 101 ladies in waiting for the queen
80. 101 grains of rice in my bowl
81. 101 doubts as to whether or not I can come up with another twenty of these.
82. 101 books I should read but haven't
83. 101 things more interesting than how a computer works. (ok, 1,000,001)
84. 101 different spoons. I like spoons.
85. 101 ml of ink wasted on this
86. 101 tiles on the bathroom floor
87. 101 responses pending on Duotrope for one of the magazines to which I subbed. One of them is mine.
88. 101 reasons why cats are better than people.
89. 101 reasons why people are better than cats.
90. 101 reasons why I should go to sleep right now.
91. 101 places I'd rather be than here, all of them warm.
92. 101 bones
93. 101 bad plot ideas
94. 101 favourite songs
95. 101 colors in my paint box
96. 101 days till summer
97. 101 marbles in Thirdling's MĂĽrmelibahn
99. 101 things out of place in my office
100. 101 trips to the community building over the years to take kids to playgroup
101. 101 smiles, because I'm done.


pacatrue said...


Most amazing piece of procrastination I've seen in a long while. 101 congratulations to you.

Nice looking cupcake, too.

Mother (Re)produces. said...

yeah. I should spend more time baking.

Kit Courteney said...


You're good at making lists!

Mother (Re)produces. said...

That's what it says on my tombstone :)