Maybe I should just cross out 'writer.' It would take some of the pressure off. Or 'Artist.' Nevermind that these are things I have always wanted to do, and have always enjoyed doing. But my attempts to get published (and actually, my attempts to even get an education as a writer) have been frustrating. I know it takes a long time. I know it takes a Teflon-coated solid steel heart. I find it so difficult, though, when I'm never even sure I'm on the right track.
At the moment, it's more like a hollow heart. Like the next person who manages to hit it, it's going to go "BONG." (and echo a lot.)
Pout. I need a hug.
Then I need a writing teacher who actually knows what he/she is doing.
3 comments:
Oh, you are not alone in those feelings!
Hey, I just came over to say hi, M.R.
Maybe you don't need a writing teacher, honey. Maybe you only need to hone in and listen to yourself and write what only you can write. Seriously.
I took creative writing classes years and years ago, and then stopped, had my kids, moved around, read a boatload but stopped writing, and life happened to me, as it does. It seasoned me, basically.
My guess is, if left to your own devices, you'd write really well. With your own voice, that you found through writing.
I've been back at it now for three and a half years - first dabbling, then scenes, then the beginning of a novel, then scenes, then struggling to finish the novel, etc etc. I had firmn rejections on story/novel excerpts a couple of years ago, with one exception, and now that I read what I was writing a couple of years ago, I see why.
This summer I sent out three pieces, and had them all accepted. I say this because I think with the writing and the rest and the writing and the revisiting old writing and the editing of it, I had seasoned myself in much the same way I was seasoned in life, with things that just do happen as we go along.
Just my two cents, though!
I don't have my blog listed on my profile, because I stay under the radar, but please visit if you have the time. McKoala, Chris, Blogless Troll, Whirl, Sarah L, Stacy, Fairyhedgehog, Pete and a couple of others are there, and so are links to their blogs.
It's: http://theirishhill.blogspot.com/
Thanks for the buck-up, Robin. I try to cheer the fuck up and write, most days, but the writing in a vacuum thing is hard. The nearest (English-speaking) writing group is on the other side of the country and it's somehow hard to judge my own progress (or lack thereof). Kind of like when I think my kids are being so naughty and then we go out where there's other kids and I realise mine are totally normal, if that makes any sense... lose my perspective. So I am rather dependant on online classes for any sort of feedback. On my better days, I can see it, though. It's as you say; I look at what I wrote a couple of years ago and cringe :o)
Anyway, thanks for stopping by. I enjoyed peeking at your blog; good luck with your novel!
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